Navigating Two Pieces of Feedback: Which Piece Should You Trust?
What happens when you don't trust the source of feedback?
Raise your hand✋🏽if you like receiving feedback. Anyone…Bueller…Bueller!
Raise your hand if you like providing Feedback.
We all know feedback is a vital part of growth. For leaders, especially, the right feedback can be the missing piece of information to help guide your personal and professional journey.
However, what happens when you receive two contrasting pieces of feedback?
How do you determine which to follow and which to disregard?
The answer isn't as straightforward as picking one over the other.
As a young leader, I was placed in this dilemma. After what I thought was an amazing set of round-robin interviews, I received two pieces of feedback about my communication style.
If this has never happened to you, just wait, it will. It’s not a horrible thing, you just need a strategy to navigate it.
Feedback A
“Steve your communication is too direct. It can be perceived as aggressive.”
Upon hearing this piece of feedback, I immediately dismissed it. I thought how could this person make such a rush to judgment from a single interview?
Then I realize, I do that all the time during my interviews.
It’s a part of my job… assess quickly based on the information the interviewee provides.
A few things I’ve learned about feedback:
Feedback is a PROCESS of providing information or reactions to someone about their actions, performance, or behavior
Feedback should be fact and situationally-based
Feedback should NOT be emotionally charged
Feedback should rooted in a trend or track record of behavior/decision-making
During the interview process, every answer I provided told a story about my ability to handle different situations. It provided a trend as to my ability to deal with my team and how I could potentially communicate with them.
Another factor we will explore a little later relative to feedback is Context.
The context in feedback is similar to the background of a picture. It sets the scene and influences how the feedback is delivered, interpreted, and ultimately applied.
In situations where your team is looking for guidance and clarity, my directness may hinder my team from receiving my message. It could reduce the chance of understanding and keep my team from becoming aligned.
Delivery matters.
Let’s look at what I considered to be positive feedback.
Feedback B
“Steve, honestly I appreciate your direct approach it’s refreshing. It leaves no room for ambiguity.”
“Oh yeah, that’s what I’m talking about!”
I immediately resonated with this piece of feedback. I thought the interviewer nailed it and they understood me.
My natural bent is direct communication due to my military background and my New York Sensibilities, LOL. I leaned heavily on this style, early in my leadership journey, which I’m sure rubbed some people the wrong way.
The issue with direct communication is in some cases, it doesn’t take context into consideration.
My rationale like most with a direct communication style is ambiguity can be a obstacle to execution.
In retail, with so many moving parts - from supply chains, talent development, new initiatives (daily) and we cannot forget customer relations - clarity in communication can drive efficiency and ensure everyone is on the same page.
Even now, I feel a direct communication style, sprinkled with my ability to ‘read the room’, is a refreshing change from those leaders tired of corporate jargon and roundabout conversations.
But I also learned critical messages delivered with empathy and understanding will foster an environment of trust and transparency.
STILL CONFUSED
So, which piece of feedback should a senior retail leader trust?
The answer isn't as straightforward as picking one over the other. Both pieces of feedback come with their own set of merits. The trick lies in understanding the context, assessing the source, and aligning it with your leadership goals.
Why Context Matters?
Just as the setting can change the mood of a photo, context can impact how feedback is received and interpreted. So, consider the context when giving or receiving feedback.
Consider potential scenarios in which the feedback was provided.
Feedback A was given because my predecessor was a poor communicator and the team didn’t respond well to his communication style.
Feedback B, the interviewer knew the market well and felt the team lacked decisiveness and needed a leader who could provide concise and clear communication.
The environment can often dictate the appropriateness of a communication style.
Assessing the Source.
Who provided the feedback?
A peer, a subordinate, or a senior?
Also, can I be honest? We are more receptive to feedback if it’s coming from a source we trust.
Ask yourself!
Are you a trusted leader?
Does your team trust your feedback?
Feedback from someone who understands the industry's nuances and challenges may carry more weight than someone unfamiliar with the market’s dynamics.
What are your ultimate goals?
Your ability to receive the feedback can be determined by your future goals.
What are my leadership gaps?
How can this feedback benefit me in my next position?
If I don’t get this new role, how I can implement the feedback to improve my leadership - NOW?
The best feedback takes into consideration feedforward targets.
Do this next!
One Thing to Ask Yourself:
Did I consider context and objectives when adapting my leadership approach based on feedback?
One Action to Take:
Invest in leadership development programs outside of your company that focus on enhancing communication and emotional intelligence.
Feedback, especially contrasting ones, offers leaders a unique opportunity. It provides a mirror, reflecting how their actions and words are perceived.
The path forward is not in choosing Feedback A over B or vice versa. It's not about blindly following one piece over the other, but about integrating the insights and adapting them to your unique leadership style.
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Excellent read! Usually we hear “perception is reality” when receiving feedback. Would you agree or disagree?